Oh I'd Die!
Saturday, November 24, 2012 • 7:44 PM • 0 comments

Pressure all over. I think I'll die before May. Ghaaaaad! Just a little segue for I feel like Im going to die because of anxiousness, panic, pressure, stress or whatever word is fit for this intense feeling living in my stomach.  I seriously just want to graduate on time but it feels like the whole universe is conspiring to make this road harder than I ever imagined. I hate the fact that I dont have any control over it huhuhu TT______TT

Im forever distracted! Im juggling all the subjects and I always end up studying a little every subject for I dont know which one to prioritize. I feel like Im burning out especially now that the first evals will be coming and I still dont have enough confidence and knowledge. Oh God! I dont wanna end up spending Christmas with all the worries and blues.

If I dont graduate on time, I feel like Im going to disappoint my family, my relatives, my clan and every people who believes that I'll graduate on time together with my  twin sister. And goodness gracious, I just saw my sister's BTS shoot for her graduation picture. I feel so bogged down by it and I can't deny how panicky I became ever since second semester began. And now Im being teary eyed while typing this cause I can't contain my feelings anymore. 

Its just...Im really having a tough time and I don't even have any assurance, and I feel like Im going to crash. I want myself to be this, have that, do this, and not do that. All I do is feel pressured, and eventually, I’ll cave in. I just need to vent out all these feelings inside me. I’m kind of scared that I won’t make it. Help me God. Please.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
- Philippians 4:6-7

Gladys/22 years old/Philippines

Im beyond your peripheral vision and aiming for art school.Im a provinciana girl at heart. I do think too much and contradicts myself most of the time.The internet doesn't speak for itself. There's more than meets the eye.